When I found out that my dad is sick, I thought to myself, "well, he's got God on his side. He has nothing to worry about." As true as that is, I find myself as the one worrying. I was okay with him being sick. Now, I have this deep rooted feeling of despair, as if I may never see my dad again. I know that this feeling is not of God, but of the enemy. So what do I do? Who do I ask why?
I've racked my mind trying to figure out why and how but I cannot come up with an answer. Matthew 11:28-30 says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (NIV). I must give up my burdens to achieve rest from my worrying.
But that one question still remains: Why? No matter how hard I try, I will never wrap my mind around the infinite wisdom and understanding that is possessed by God. My pastor always says, "sometimes you have to serve God with a big question mark." Even though we ask "why God?" we must always know that He has our best interests in mind.
As I sit here trying to come up with verses that may offer up some explanation how my dad and I (and my family) can cope with this revelation, only one verse comes to me. I know that this is God speaking directly to me and my family. 2Corinthians 12:7-10 - "And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me... Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am made strong."
I should rejoice in Christ Jesus knowing that He is greater than illness and any other affliction. In fact, I shouldn't be surprised that something like this is happening. 1 Peter 4:12-13 says, "Beloved, do not think it's strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy." I should count this as a blessing! My family and I are suffering for Christ's sake. [We] can do all things through Christ who strengthens [us] (Philippians 4:13).
This is a testimony to all who are suffering with illness. May God bless you and give you the strength you need!